My life up till the time I was 5 was perfectly normal. When i was almost 3 my parents had my brother. she i turned 5 i got diagnosed with ADHD and oppositional defiance disorder(odd). After that my life was just annoying. I was always the kid who sat away from everyone else not because i wanted to but because nobody cared to have me around. My life going to shit started with a kid in my access class in 6th grade, giving me a ring of glowsticks and told me to hang myself; i walked right out of school. I was pretty much teased, harassed, bullied, whatever the fuck you wanna call it the entire time till i graduated. After that i decided to go to a technical high school wear i pursued electrical. I was at the low end of the age ranged so as a sophomore and i just turned 15 in december. My freshman year i started to drink and started going down a very steep path. I had no friends since the ones i "had" were fake. Everyone always thought i was a normal, goody two-shoes kid. Ive been faking it for years. If anyone ever asked if i was alright, i would just tell them that I'm perfectly fine. On the inside i was being ripped apart. I was harassed cuz i was 14 and i had never had a girlfriend. i was told daily to kill myself,drink bleach, hang myself, you name it. I never had any real friends. Even the one kid i considered my best friend i wouldn't tell this stuff to because i didn't trust anyone. Ive been going to a therapist for 10 years now and I'm still there. They think it will help but it won't and my parents can't see that. My freshman year i started to smoke and it helped void the pain. I started cutting my palms with razors and occasionally my wrists. still my parents didn't know a damn thing. My sophomore year, i became friends with a few freshman. these were people that i actually trusted and i considered my real friends. I started getting more and more depressed so once again i turned to drinking. I had been getting payed to house sit a neighbors house while they were away for the winter. I needed to get something quickly so i dug throughout the cabinets and found a huge stash of alcohol. Over the next few weeks i had been pouring water bottles and filling them with whiskey, brandy, scotch, tequila, and most of all ;vodka. I had been bringing it into school in water bottles since the vodka looked just like water. I did this for weeks and weeks until one day when i was sharing with friends like normal, One of the kids started throwing up. He got alcohol poisoning and i got fucked over. I got expelled from school until the next year and had to stay home alone doing a little bit of online class and then playing in xbox the whole day. Then my parents threatened to put me in a mental hospital. I stated talking to this freshman girl who was sorta dark like me. we started talking more and realized how much we have in common. I finally decided to ask her out and to my amazement she said yes. Jayde is the most amazing girl i have ever met. she understands me and i understand her. we were made fir eachother. I love her so much and she is the most beautiful girl ever. ever since i met her, i feel like my life finally has a meaning. two weeks ago i was literally gonna kill myself. Now i never want my life to end...

I love you Jayde